I unintentionally discovered one method for ensuring you will not have repeat business from a client. And for the sake of showing my humility, while sharing my mishaps, I created a simple step-by-step guide on how to lose a client.
HOW TO LOSE A CLIENT IN 5 SIMPLE STEPS
1. Ask client if they would be willing to move their appointment up to an earlier time, preferably if it will involve them rushing or canceling previously made plans. Schedule them for this earlier appointment time.
2. Show up 1 hour late.
3. Promise you can accomplish all the appointment goals by a particular time.
4. While they are helping hold your patient in preparation for a dental float, spray them directly in the face using a dosing syringe full of dirty water from the horse’s water bucket.
5. Finish the appointment 30 minutes later than you promised so that it interferes with the plans they had to rearrange in order to meet you at the time you requested.
When my boss couldn’t make it to her appointment at a nearby barn, I offered to step in and help carry some of the appointment load. Not only was this my first time meeting the client, but it was also the same barn that I had visited earlier in the morning for an emergency colic appointment. This client had one horse scheduled for a dental and two horses scheduled for vaccines. Having been on emergency calls all night, and reporting to the Colic first thing in the morning, I never had time to get vaccines. When I agreed to take the appointment (Since I was already at the barn), I also realized I was out of tetanus, West Nile and flu/rhino vaccines. While my office staff arranged for the client to come to the barn at 11 am instead of 2pm, I embarked on what I thought was going to be a quick trip to the office for more vaccines. But phone calls, questions, client drop-in and various other events resulted in my taking an hour longer than I had hoped.
By the time I showed up at 12pm, the client had already called my boss to see what the deal was. She let me know what her wait time had been, and I apologized profusely. With a riding lesson scheduled at 1, she was skeptical I could get everything done in an hour. Determined to regain her trust and confidence, I promised I’d have it done.
I set up my dental equipment, vaccinated the horses and got ready to sedate the gelding for his dental. “Oh yeah, he doesn’t sedate well just so you know. He’ll look like he’s about to fall over asleep, but as soon as you start working on him he’s wide awake.” Let’s just say she knew exactly what she was talking about. And after I felt confident in his sedation level, I filled a large dosing syringe full of water from his dirty bucket. I put the tip of the syringe in his mouth, and as I shoved with all my might on the plunger…he almost reared up. It was perfectly coordinated and timed, and instead of the water going into his mouth…the water shot full-force straight into the client’s face.
Basically, she got a power-wash to the face and was soaked. She did not laugh. She looked absolutely pissed and annoyed. I told her I was mortified, and that I was sorry. To which she responded, “I’ve had much dirtier and nastier things on my face.” I laughed, and went to work.
What would’ve normally been a 15 minute dental float was a 45 minute struggle between a horse’s buckling knees and his frantic swinging head. By the time I was done, the client had her own client waiting to begin the riding lesson. Embarassed, mortified and disappointed by the multi-modal failure, I left one more apology with her before I drove off to the next appointment.
As soon as a left the barn driveway, I was dialing the office to give them the step-by-step account, and share my new found method to ensure that I’ll never be the vet she requests to work on her animals. We all had a good laugh before the office manager said, “Well, I doubt it cost us any money. She’s had an outstanding balance of over 3 grand for the past couple years and refuses to put a dime toward it.” She paused. “Maybe after spaying her point blank in the face, she’ll get the hint that we kinda want to be paid for our previous services.”
Despite her account delinquency and bad attitude in general, I still felt horribly unprofessional and foolish…though after talking with the Office manager, I felt a little less guilty.
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